Like I feel like that would be an obvious thing,

I would have NEVER thought of this…

How are there no personal versions for wandering around on a sunny day with portable shade that gets you a charged battery pack?

Oh my god! THATS what umbrella man was doing! Whew! Solved a huge conspiracy there!

…wait, but that STILL proves he was a time traveler! Dammit!

Comic sans wasn’t invented yet.

I mean, I joke, but it probably actually wasn’t.

Well we’ll never know NOW!!!

That was Shredder.

And as always, Jurassic Park teaches us everything we need to know.

“They’re moving in herds…they DO move in herds!”

Can’t have that!

Not even sure the black part is relevant. They also voted for trump over a white lady in 2016.

Where do you take them?

Well hello there!

slams face into wall

skips away giggling

Why do we not simply transplant the hair from the mice, onto the humans?

And I bet the lil guy just looked at you with pure excitement. Completely unaware what just happened.

At least it wasn’t your balls! Then again, at least you still HAVE your balls! Unlike your dog…

Don’t make new communities for topics that already have communities on Lemmy. You CAN, but, like all things in life, Jurassic Park teaches us best.

“Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they COULD they never stopped to think if they SHOULD!”

And as we all know, if you ignore the teachings of Jurassic Park, a T-Rex will eat you as you sit on the toilet.

Treat women the same way that you treat men.

Oh god, that’s terrible advice!

Me with men: “Damn Frank! You see that hottie by the bar?”

“Yeah. I spent the night with her last week! And then again in the morning!”

“Nice!” slaps Franks ass

everybody laughs

The next day:

“Damn Amber! You see that hot stud by the bar?”

“The…the what?”

looks over to bar, only see one person, a guy

“That’s my husband. Wait…are you bi?”

“No. Just treating you like one of the guys. So that’s your husband? Nice!”

slaps ambers ass

deafing silence as Amber rightfully glares

Hitler had a similiar program.

I’m fully expecting them to introduce “Trump Youth Programs”.

I mean, could be worse. I’m sure literal crackheads have cats. Cats that have licked literal crack.

The same paws that were kicking around kitty litter 20 minutes ago.

I buy pesto sauce from Aldis. They come in little glass jars.

I use them to portion out protein powder. So instead of 1 big plastic jug, I have about 50 little glass jars.

Each one a single use that fits easily into my gym bag.

For bigger ones, like pickle jars, you could fill it with candy, or pasta, or coins, or cereal.

Stays fresher longer sealed in glass, than just in a plastic bag inside a box.

I don’t. And I don’t understand why I’m the only one who just in general would rather hear silence then music.

No money, mo sauce!

It’s a waste for MOST people. Then there’s people like me. I don’t have uses for everything I get. They go into storage.

Then one day, someone is like "Hey, remember MC Hammer? Ha! It would be funny if we could listen to his 1991 album right now.

And then I’m like “be right back”.

And then people are like “why do you HAVE this???”

And I say “I was using it as a doorstop. I needed something I didn’t care about that would just end up in a landfill.”